I used to have a car…it was a nice car, with a/c, a radio, power windows, the works… But alas, it was also a used car (I am part of the reduce, reuse, recycle crowd so I haven’t bought a new car in over 10 years.) When I was side-swiped by another motorist several months ago, my car was totaled. Not enough value in it to fix it. Thank goodness no one was hurt in the accident, but I was stuck hoofing it. I got a nice sized check from the insurance company so I decided to save for a Prius and start riding the bus. That is where my journey began.

My memories of riding the bus weren’t pleasant. I associated it with school and hot days with loud children chunking spit wads, and, in general, awkward times. I didn’t ride a local bus around town much because, as a kid and even into college, I rode a bike. I could come and go when and how I wanted, could take fun short-cuts through parking lots and such, and even though I arrived sweaty, I was free. Tired, maybe, but free. That’s just not how I saw the bus. But, being chosen car-less, I decided to give modern mass transit a fair shake.

Little did I know, though, how much other people seemed to have negative ideas about riding the bus. My friends, even my new-age, modern-minded, vegetarian, recyling friends, all looked at me with pity in their eyes when I told them I was riding the bus. For the first few weeks, they would offer me rides or tell me about some great deal of a car one of their neighbors had for sale, but after awhile that stopped. I felt a real disconnect from the socially conscious, energy efficient nirvana they talked about pursuing and how they acted about the actuality of it when a friend of theirs was living it.

Complete strangers were happy to fill the pity gap, though, as they saw me waiting at a bus stop. They would stop and offer me a ride because they just “felt bad” that a “nice woman” like me would be waiting for the bus. What’s that about? Do normal, cleanly dressed, law abiding, working people not ride the bus? The prejudice was obvious. I even did experiments to test if people would stop and offer me a ride. If I sat with an obvious look of disgust and impatience like I was too good to be there, tons of cars would offer me a ride (which of course, I did not accept for safety sake). If I acted joyous, soaking up the sunshine without a care in the world, they would honk and wave and smile and go about their way. Hmmm….interesting.

So, I ask you. Are you too sexy for the bus? I firmly believe that social stigma and group behaviors are what drives much of what is happening in our world. We all want to belong and be accepted, not condemned or judged. We want to be accepted as a proper member of the tribe. In your mind, do I have to own a car to fit in? Do you think poorly of the people riding the bus? Are people who afford and use cars somehow held in higher esteem? Is image and status more important to you than energy efficiency and mass transit solutions to urban overcrowding?

I ask these questions of you because I had to ask them of myself as well. What I soon realized was that all of my own preconceptions about mass transit were wrong. I enjoyed the time to read or meditate or visit with the other passengers while I was riding—yes, it takes time but it’s a stress free journey. Many of the riders have been more kind, open minded, and accepting than many of my car-owning acquaintances. They are interesting, varied, and cover a wide gamut of vocations, life roles, and points of view. And almost every one of them tells the bus driver thank you when they leave the bus. To me, that’s great. That’s putting your money where your mouth is at and I admire it.

So, next time you pass a bus, consider what you think of the people inside. Maybe even hop a bus for a day and see what it’s like—I challenge you to a month of riding the bus. See what it’s like. Energy efficient cars are great and I hope to own one someday. But mass transit will only work if we don’t stigmatize the people who participate in it. They are doing their part to reduce greenhouse emissions and reduce inner city traffic and to be good, energy conscious citizens. Those people deserve our respect and thanks, not our pity. Get on board and see for yourself how great it feels.

P.S. They have a/c…